Wedding Invitations

So Kevin sent out the first batch of wedding invitations late last week and we got our first response card today *yay* from my cousin Michael and his wife Becky. We went to their wedding in November 2004 I think it was. wow! I can't believe it was that long ago.

I got an email today from my cousin Angie asking if I had invited Michel's mom and dad (grace and Tony) the answer is yes but we're sending them out in batches. It's cheeper and I'm doing them all by hand so it's taking awhile. Plus Kevin is hand adressing them. So I'll call Angie tonight and talk to her about this. I have to calm down first...I"m PMSing lol

My mom is supposed to come by tonight to help me with the invitations. All next week I'll be working on tying the tags to the maracas and next weekend I'll prolly work on the centerpieces.

Still haven't heard anything from Kevin's mom. NOt expecting to.

Dealing with the In Law

So...Kevin and I went over to his parents' house today to celebrate his dad's and his nephew's bday (they're both tomorrow) It was decent. Gave people their invitations as soon as we walked in practically. Talked a bit about the wedding but nothing major. Have a decent meal finished w/ cake and ice cream. I need to mention there is NO ALCOHOL CONSUMED! THIS ALL HAPPENS STONE COLD SOBER! As we're getting ready to leave his mom asks me about the shower. I honestly don't know what to say. So I suggest if they really want to do one, to have a small get together with family. That I don't really have a whole lot of people to invite. Didn't even get to mention that I'd rather have the money lol. Seriously...why spend $200 on a shower I don't really need. Give us that money so we can spend it on wedding stuff we do need...like booze (lol) Then his mom brings up Aunt Mickey and Aunt Sue. OMG

I try to keep it cool. That I understand their are issues but it's important to us that Sue be there as she is Kevin's godmother. And MIckey's still invited to the reception. I explain I know there are issues and that if Mickey shows Sue won't, so to keep the peace this is what we came up with. I explain I don't care what the issues are. That it's kevin's GODMOTHER and he wants her there. She tells me we're letting Sue dictate our wedding. That's when I lost it and things get fuzzy. I know I started yelling and she yelled back telling me not to point my finger at her...that I'm in her house and she's Kevin's mother so I should show some respect...I know I said something about Mickey being here twice a year and never making an effort to see Kevin...hell we never get a christmas card from her...Which Kerryann buts in and says "oh 3 times she tried to see you" I'm sorry but 3 times is supposed to make up for everything. Once we weren't even in state, and the other time kevin remembers anyone mentioning Mickey being in town was a friday afternoon that they were all meeting friday night. Nice notice. I mean it's not like she doesn't plan these trips in advance as she is coming in from Georgia. Even a week's notice and Kevin can get the night off work (he works every weekend as he is the executive chef in a restaurant and fri & Sat are traditionally their busiest nights) I know I yelled something about how we've been together 6 years and the ONLY time I met her was at her mother's funeral for about 5 minutes. And I remember telling her AGAIN that Sue is Kevin's godmother...to which she said "So?" ... in case this means nothing to you, Kevin's mom is always always ALWAYS telling kevin to remember he's Zach's godfather and how important it is to have a special relationship with him because of that etc....so how come it's important for Kevin to have a relationship with his godson but not his godmother? OH! and she sais something about how Aunt Sue is only talking to us "since you got the house" i mean seriously...WTF is that supposed to mean?

So finally I left. I was prepared to call my mother to come pick me up or something. I didn't know I didn't care. Wait in the car until Kevin left. Whatever. Well Kevin walked out right after me. Apparently his mom told him "well then I guess I'm not going to go to your wedding either" Yeah. That's nice.

So I'm sure I"m going to be vilified. I called his other brother and spoke to his wife (they had left already) to fill them in on what happened. I mean I was shouting and swearing I was so mad. HOw dare she say Aunt Sue is dictating our wedding when she's basically blackmailing her son "well if Mickey's not able to be there then I'm not going either" I mean we have bent over backwards to figure out a simple solution to this problem. And wtf is the big deal anyway? His Aunt Mickey has NEVER wanted to be a part of Kevin's life in the almost 6 years we have been together. Why is this so important that she be there? And why can't she see that we have tried to make this work. We're already compromising. We already came up with a solution. She doesn't like it? Too bad! It's our wedding not hers. This isn't a decision we came to quickly or lightly. We pondered this and discussed it many nights to figure it out.

Kevin says it's a miracle we haven't come to a head like this until now. And that if his mom were healthy we'd be butting heads all over the place about this wedding. I say he's most probably right. But I refuse to back down. Julie (kevn's sis in law) even said It's our decisions to make. And she needs to learn to respect them. Yes she's Kevin's mother...but I"m soon to be his wife. I've been with him almost 6 years thru good and bad...and believe me we have had ALOT of bad to get to the good we have right now.

I've calmed down alot, thanks to Julie and a chat with my sister as well...plus the extreme venting and crying I did on the car ride home. Velisia suggested I wait a week (that's how long kevin says it takes his mom to calm down) and call to apologize for blowing up the way i did, but this is the way it's going to be. That I really want her at the wedding. and If she can't understand, well, at least I've spoke my piece and put the ball in her court.

Plus I'm going to have Kevin call his Aunt Mickey tomorrow to find out what the deal is anyway. I mean seriously why is this even an issue? I know she's his aunt, but she has to respect that Sue, regardless of whatever issues there are (and there are big ones...obviously between Pam (kevin's mom) and Sue as well...I didn't realize how much until tonight) that Sue is Kevin's godmother and that we are just trying to keep a situation from happening.

Personally I'm so frigging sick of this I'm ready to not have anyone there. I mean, why can't people just suck it up and be happy for us. Why is this even an issue I have to defend anyway. Suck it up, stay on opposite sides of the room, and just be happy for us.

OMG I'm so mad about this still. And this is nothing to do with is I like Sue more than Mickey. This is about having Kevn's godmother, who is making the wedding shawl BY THE WAY, at his wedding. It's a perk that I like her so much. And it's not that I don't like MIckey...I don't know her. I mean almost 6 years I'm been with Kevin and not even a phone call or a christmas card...so this outrage at her not being invited to the actual wedding ceremony is just laughable.

Anyway...I must get off the puter and back to something constructive...altho I'm totally not in the wedding mood anymore. Maybe I'll drown my sorrows in some chai. And contemplate if it's too late to go to Vegas lol.

My fabulous weekend

One of my best friends in the whole wide world, Heather (a.k.a. Chicken) came up this weekend to be with me and do wedding stuff. I was so honored. It was so much fun! She got here Friday evening. We caught up a bit and went to the bar for karaoke (she didn't sing :( she has such a great voice) and stayed up way too late talking and having a couple beers.

Saturday we woke up around 10am. My mom and my cousin Angie also came over and I ran a little wedding sweatshop producing jordan almond favors. I must tell you that before all this I was cutting paper like a madwoman to get the tags for the maracsa done and the "day after picnic" invitations cut just right (they still have to be assembled)...(i can't find my camera or I'd have all kinds of pics...i have to find it today) Chicken wrapped the lamonds in the tulle circles, i cut ribbon (for awhile..until i had to take a shower) Angie and my mom tied the burgundy ribbon onto the packages. We got over 80 done! I found out I didn't get enough silver cord for my maraca tags, so we did a few before we went for my final fitting at david's bridal @ 2pm. I had a whole crew there with me...Julie & the boys, Aunt Sue, my mom and Chicken. The dress fit perfectly except the hem (which I now wish I had kept long...it cost $120 just to hem it..another $35 to bustle) I tried on the jewelry to go with it. I'm still not 100% sure on what I'm going with...but I'm leaning towards the small v-shaped crystal necklace Aunt Sue is letting me borrow. The earrings are also V shaped and have a row of blue crystals (my something borrowed AND something blue) I looked gorgeous. I'm not even worried about being fat. I also tried my veil on with it...perfect! and the tulle we got to make a wrap...gorgeous! Chicken took it home with her to make it (cuz she's my costuming genius)

After the fitting we went downriver to see the wedding site and the hall. I don't think chicken was much impressed with the hall, but that's okay. I love it. She also made a good point about the wedding site in that there's big metal poles in front of the bridge (to keep cars from driving over it as it's wide) that we're going to need to decorate somehow.

Then we came home to take a small nap before our night. I had tickets to see the Violent Femmes!!!!! IN royal oak at the royal oak music theatre. It's a small venue and we got there just in time to get GREAT seats! Well not seats...but a spot to stand on some riser step things that we could sit on. The opening guy (man incorporated) was okay...all his songs were about a minute long and totally punk...the 2nd band..which we both thought was the femmes cuz we didn't realize there were 2 opening bands...totally sucked! The guy kinda sounded like the femmes lead singer and they didn't introduce themselves at first...so i was totally bummed thinking the femmes had a new sound blah blah blah...wasn't until about 4 songs in they finally talked to the audience and said "we'd like to that the violent femmes for letting us play for you we're blah blah blah" (i can't remember) so Chicken and I both breathed a sigh of relief and sat down for the rest of their set. They were so bad. All thier songs sounded the same. It was like one long 45 minute song. BLECH!

The femmes were amazing! I was amazed at how many songs I remembered (besides the regular "kiss off" "Blister in the Sun" and "add it up" They played Blister like 4 songs in...they ended their set with Add it up and encored with Kiss off.

So we left the concert totally deaf (and loving it) and came home to eat something before meeting kevin up at the bar for some drinks. We came home and chatted and watched some TV until Chicken fell asleep.

She left the next morning around 11:30am. She's gonna be herethe day before the wedding when she comes up. I'm so glad! I miss her so much!

So my mom came by Sunday evening and we did more maraca tags, cut paper for the invitations, and figured out the label sizes for the invitations. She's supposed to come back by tomorrow I think to help some more.

Today I printed out all the response cards. I'm putting those in envelopes and putting stamps on half (we're still not completely sure on how many invitations we're sending out) then I'm assembling the last of the jordan almond bags and the invitations for the day after party. Tonight Kevin is going to approve the wording and design of the invitations so I can print them out and assemble those tomorrow.

I"M GETTING SO EXCITED!!!!!We only have a couple more things to purchase for the wedding ... mostly decorations...and we're home free!

OH! for transportation we decided to go with everyone driving them selves pretty much and we're going to rent a nice car for us to drive in. It will be much cheeper than renting a party bus or even a couple mini-vans.

We wet to my dad's Monday for dinner and to get addresses. Good news...the drama over my Aunt Kim and Grandma Liz is done. Apparently Liz isn't gonna come so Aunt Kim is (yay). They gave me a short list of about 13 addresses. So much nicer than my mom's. They were giving me people I don't know. Seriously. My papa asked me to invite "hector Pardo" I told him I don't know him. I dont' know any Pardos. "sure you do" is his reply" your mom and Joe went to his 50th birthday party a couple years ago" oh yeah! That pardo (insert sarcasm) Seriously! We're paying for everything ourselves ... well most of it ourselves... I'm not inviting every tom dick and Jose that might be distantly related to me. So we're weeding thru everything tonight and tomorrow. Invites are going out this weekend. FINALLY!

And we still haven't gotten our credit back from that invitations lady...nor did we get our invitations.

We DID get our personalized champange glasses, personalized cake knife and server set, reception card box, wedding mints and mardi gras beads and masks (for the next day party) today!

WO allmyblog pots lately ar so long! I'm so sorry! If you made it down this far I applaud you *hugs* I have more to say but I have to get back to invitation stuff

I

Wedding update (sorry so long)

Well let's see....Chicken is coming into town tomorrow evening. It's a 9 hour drive (yes DRIVE) from where she is near St. Louis so I'msure she's gonna be exhausted. I'm getting things organized today as much as possible. Friday we may not do much, but Saturday morning we're waking up around 9am, my cousin Angie and (hopefully) my mom are coming by around 10am and we're gonna get the next day party invitations done and put tags on the maracas and get the jordan almonds in their pretty tulle circles with burgundy ribbon. I will be taking pics of it all. Then saturday afternoon we go to my dress fitting with all my crap (veil, shoes, tulle for wrap, jewelry, etc...) then I'm thinking we go to the wedding site in Elizabeth Park so I can show her and the hall in wyandotte (hopefully) maybe meeting up with her brother Gordon so they can have a small visit. Then it's the Violent Femmes concert in Royal Oak that night. And Sunday she's leaving.

We were gonna be doing invitations and stuff, but here's the scoop on that. Hopefully we still will, but not with the invitations we originally wanted. I had put in an order with a website for such gorgeous cardstock to print our own invitations. When I called (cuz the online ordering wasn't working...that should have been my first clue) she told me it would be 2 weeks. Fine. That would have put the invites here last week and given us the weekend to address and get them together and out in the mail. Well 2 weeks went by and no invites...as a matter of fact she hadn't even put the charge on our CC yet. So Kevin starts calling her on Friday to find out what's going on. She says she'll find out and call him right back. Well...no call back. So Kevin tries calling her back from 4pm on...at first he gets her voice mailbox. He doesn't leave a message cuz he wants to talk to her directly (and he has a really bad habit of not leaving messages...his whole family does...me..I'd rather have leave one) when he calls her back over the weekend, he's not even given the option of leaving a message...her mailbox is now full. Monday rolls around and lo and behold the charge for the invites is now posted on our CC. This has the potential to be good...i mean she hasn't charged us the whole 2 weeks it hasn't been in stock, so this much mean it's in and on it's way right? WRONG!

So Monday he finally gets her onthe phone again. She puts him on hold to check the order status and, I don't know, she much not know how to work her phnes cuz she hangs up on him. So he calls her back immediately ... only to get her STILL FULL voice mailbox. So Tuesday I email her:

We have been trying to get in touch with you since Friday. We ordered invitation cardstock and you said it would take 2 weeks to get it if it was out of stock (and you thought it was) I understood. It had now been closer to 3 weeks and still no cardstock. And worse, when my fiance called you friday you said you would call right back with an update on the order. You never did. And we can't leave a message because since Friday your message box has been full. We called yesterday, again to inquire about the order, and were put on hold and eventually hung up on. When we called back immediately afterwards, no answer and STILL a full mailbox. And today I get a message telling me "the subscriber you are trying to reach is out of the service area"

I understand having a life and all, but we were counting on the invitaion cardstock being here by last weekend. That was what I was told. I am sure you deal with unreasnable brides all the time. I have tried to be understanding, but when I can't even get a simple answer to my wuestions about our order on when it will be here, I am unsatisfied.

DO NOT DO ANYTHING REGARDING OUR ORDER UNTIL YOU SPEAK DIRECTLY TO ME> Jazmyn

and I gave her my phone number. She called me IMMEDIATELY! Giving me the excuse that her daughter was sick yesterday and that's why she didn't get back with us. Okay...I'm sorry your daughter was sick, but you are running a BUSINESS!!! And this is WEDDING SEASON!!! Our wedding is right before wedding season (mid May - mid August) so I know she's gotta be busy dealing with people...plus she's been in business for at least 5 years...this isn't something new...juggling your home issues with your work issues. And I don't think I'm unreasonable as to want a simple answer to what is going on with my order.

I didn't say this to her ... I said I'm sorry about your daughter but as I stated in the email we've been trying to find out what's going on since Friday. WELL...turns out the item still isn't in stock, and it won't be until MAYBE friday (tomorrow) at which point she can overnight them if i want. HELL NO I DON"T WANT!! I wanted them a week ago when you originally promised. Now my invitations are going to be going out later than I wanted and we're going to be rushing around like mad to get them done (did i mention Kevin's hand addressing each envelope cuz he can calligraphy) So i tell her that's unacceptable and I want my order cancelled and the amount credited back to us. She agrees and we get off the phone. That was Tuesday. It's now Thursday and the credit hasn't appeared. I AM PISSED!

So In the meantime luckily Michael's craft store is having a sale on wedding stuff so we're getting invitation kits thru them. They aren't as dramatically striking as the ones I originally wanted, but they'll do. They have a handmade paper quality to them. They don't really match anything about the wedding lol, but that's okay.

So, the moral of this story is...if you ever plan to get married and you ever plan to DIY invitations...don't order from http://www.cjpaper.com

ANYWAY... so Sunday we cleaned the house in anticipation of chicken's arrival and Monday we did wedding stuff...went to Michael's and bought some stuff for the wedding...tulle ribbon for decorations, cardstock and ribbons to make invites for the day after party, tulle circles for jordan almonds and soap favors, wedding program paper (so I'm not doing the pretty wedding programs...but these are nice), and I think that's it. OH! and cardstock and decorative paper for the tags for the maracas. It was about $50 for everything. We may have more than we need, but that's okay, it can be used for crafty projects down the road. Plus I'm on a group where I can sell stuff or even offer it free (cheapcycle or freecycle)

Kevin's getting the jordan almonds tomorrow so I have them for sat morning for us to package up. i have 160 tulle circles lol. I figured i'd package more than we actually need cuz i know people like jordan almonds. Me? not so much. We're just going with the plain white ones. in ivory tulle circles. with burgundy ribbon tied around.

I'm getting all the paper ready as best I can for assembling things saturday as well. Or Friday night depending on when chicken gets in and how she feels. I have the cardstock cut, printed and cut out the invitation wording and printed and cut out the tags for the maracas. and I have rubber bands for the tulle circles. And *maybe* the invitations all worded and printed out so we can at least assemble them.

CRAP! I was supposed to call photographers today! oh well. Guess I got stuff to do tomorrow before chicken shows (besides cleaning the house one more final time before she gets here)

Just found out that my friend Ricky is planning on moving the last week of April/first week of May. That's just wonderful. Not only am i sad cuz he won't be here, but frankly I'm a little disappointed and depressed right now. When all that crap happened with Larry, Ricky offered to help me with my dress since Larry was no longer helping. That went out the window. Which is worked out cuz my mom is helping us with the dress now. But he had originally offered to pay for the wedding cake as well. He kept trying to get me to go to a baker out here to choose the cake (instead of having Hazel make it) and I consistently refused cuz I wanted Hazel to do it. For one I knew it would be cheaper and for 2 she's my friend...so I see him online (before I find out he's moving right during my wedding) and ask him about the cake and he says "oh..well I can give you $50 or $75 towards it...is that okay?" what am I supposed to say "no"? So I say "fine...whatever you can help with is great" but right now I'm ready to cry. WHY DO PEOPLE OFFER AT ALL? They never mean it.

wedding update

Well my puter is acitng up so i can't upload any piccies, but i got alot done this weekend with my mom. And she's starting to get excited about the whole thing, so I'm happy *yay*

We spent saturday shopping for wedding stuff. Got my bra corset thingy (a bra with boning) @ a specialty shop about 20 minutes from the house. @ david's bridal they wanted $70 ...@ the specialty shop we got it for $44 and my mom bought me an everyday bra for $30 ... so i got 2 for the price of one prettymuch. It sounds expensive to spend $30 on a bra, but it's the most comfortable thing I've ever worn! I recommend everyone should go there...or to a specialty store near you where you can get fitted by someone who knows what they're doing. She looked at me and knew what size I was! (which thankfully I actually had been wearing the correct size bra...altho not as comfy as my new one) I can't remember what the name of the place is, but it's in Allen Park on Allen Road between Ecorse and Goddard across the street from the library. I will never buy another bra from anywhere else again.

So our day was something like this: we went to lunch then to david's bridal to try and get a swatch (they didn't have one but I got something I could use to match things up) while there I noticed a tulle wrap they had on a mannequin. It looked really easy to DIY so we went to hancock fabrics where we found some already sparkly tulle in ivory (it had crystal rhinestone thingys on it) which we bought to make a wrap for me. then we went to michael's next door and bought rings for the soap i'm making and votive wrap stickers (we can print our names and date on to make personalized votives) and seals for our invitations and checked out wedding stuff there. then we went to a party store to check our their wedding stuff...where I found the perfect cups for the wedding. They're $5 for 25 i think, but they're hard plastic and perfect for margaritas. I hate when you get plastic cups and the margarita salt doesn't stick to the top. then we went to the bra place and then shopping for shoes. OH! I completely forgot! After david's bridal we went to payless shoes cuz it was practically right next door and i found PErFECT SHOES!!!! For the end of the night you know when my feet are tired from being in heels...they look like this but have hearts instead of the #34



the red matches the red in my dress PERFECTLY!!!! If i want to I can doll them up, but i totally won't need to. I also foun a pair of Champion shoesthat I thoughtwere ugly when i first saw them, but tried them on and fell in love! They are the most comfortable shoes in the world. when I can I'll take pics of them so you can see. Plus Payless was BOGO (buy one get one half off) so it was such a deal!

We went to Sears for shoes. I didn't think I would find anything there, but lo and behold I found 7 pairs that would work. I tried them all on...luckily I didn't need wide in any of them...and found the most gorgeous pair! Silver with rhinestones. 3 inch heels. It was between them and another pair with 3 1/2 or 4 inch heels...ultimately I went with the one that was more stable. I know, 3 inch heels sound high, but they really aren't to me. I can't wait to show them off. Maybe I'll try to upload pics tomorrow first thing when I turn the puter on...I kinda played around today and now the puter is making funny noises so I have to get off soon.

We also went by the hall so I could show it to her and ran into an old old friend from Rouge, Jeff Ramatowski. I had such a crush on him in the 7th grade lol. He was having a drink at the PLAV when we went in so I invited him to the reception. Who knows if he'll show. Anyway, they were having an event that night and were setting up for it, so we just took a quick peek in so she could see and it was so pretty! It's really not going to need much decorating...which saves us $$ as well. The other hall was just a big ugly room compared to this one. I really need to take pics to show. But pretty much the hall in going to be decorated with tulle and xmas lights around the ceiling and on the bar and we're gonna have oodles of candles on each table and the centerpieces of silk roses with silk rose petals acting as a kind of table runner. We're using real linen for the tables cuz kevin can get those cheep thru work. And we're going to decorate the head table with rose petals and candles (no centerpieces) along the edge nearest the guests and some pretty decorative wedding lights along the front.

Let's see...oh! I talked to my step mom the other day and her and my dad are paying for the entire hall!!!! including bartender!! $500!! I'm so excited! It actually made me cry. I mean, the hall was pretty much taken care of anyway cuz my mom had offered to pay for half as well...but now that's $$ that can go to other things! YAY! like a photographer.

Which brings me to Monday. We went to a local wedding photographer that we were referred to by David's bridal (the king of one stop shopping for your wedding) and they showed us their packages. It was all good...10 hours of photgrapher time in 4 different locations (which in our case would have been where I was getting ready, at the wedding site, at the reception and one more site in between) along with a backdrop station set up @ the reception for portrait style piccies...but here's the rub. I assumed it wold be something like when you get senior pics taken or something that they would let you pick a picture package size and you'd get the proofs and you'd make your own album type thing. Well they don't offer that. They make the album for you. And you can't buy your negatives for 2 years. And ala carte pics are uber expensive (like a wallet was about $4) The package which had the book style we liked and included 2 mini clone books (mini versions of your larger wedding book...which were meant to be like parent wedding books but the parents couldn't choose what photos they wanted in the book, they were stuck with whatever you chose for your personal wedding book) which allowed us a max of 72 pics on 28 pages (that's if we chose to go with all 3x5s) which we had to pick out of over 3000 pics (on average that's what 10 hours gives you) was $2800!!! That's $100 a page!!! WTF!?! PLUS we didn't get to keep our proofs (they call them "previews")

The payment plan was great...$600 to book the date...$700 2 months later when we picked up the previews...75% of the remaining balance when we made the final order (which was around 2 months later) and then remainder when the order was done (again around 2 months time) with nothing due on the wedding day. BUT i'm not paying $2800 for 72 pictures! SCREW THAT! As it is I'm planning the guest book so I can get pics of everyone there and cameras for the reception tables (which kevin realizes isn't as expensive a cost as he first thought) and I'm sure people are gonna have their own digital cams and whatnot so we'll have a ton of pics. We prettymuch just need a photographer for the wedding itself so we can get pretty pics before during and after.So my mom is talking to someone and we're going to shop around this next week.

OH! and sunday I went over to my friend Hazel's house and we worked out most of the logistics of the cake. Once she works with the fondant we'll be golden. Hopefully Sunday or next week sunday we can finalize the details and stuff with her. WOW! I was looking for wedding stuff online andlost track of time and now it's almost 8pm and I have to get off the puter before it officially dies. *hugs*